i know excatly how your feeling with people you love leaving and your parents being painful„ ive learnt that if you find something your passionate about like music, it helps, and be active, i hope youll get through :):)
Thank you for the post! I am very passionate about my music, it does help me get through it. You always have to get it out someway I’ve learned, because you don’t want that negative stuff inside of you…
I’m tired of always PRETENDING that everything is FINE. Really, you could be responsible and do things if you wanted to. Stop drinking, stop making excuses, go out and get a stupid job and make some money! I wish I could scream in your face all of this, but I never will. Because I’m too much of a caring person.
Me:NO. Because it's always IMPOSSIBLE to be MAD at you
Austin:You sure? From this morning I was thinking not only were you mad, but you hated me.
What I wish I would say:YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT I'M MAD AT? I'M MAD AT MYSELF. HOW HAVE I ALLOWED TO ULTIMATELY CARE MORE ABOUT YOU THEN YOU EVER HAVE FOR ME. YOU'VE NEVER EVER SHOWN THAT YOU CARE ABOUT ME EVEN IN THE SLIGHTEST. I CAN NEVER EVER HATE YOU AND I WILL NEVER STAY MAD AT YOU. EVER. YOU NEVER TAKE ME SERIOUSLY. IT'S ALWAYS LAUGHS. YOU THINK YOU KNOW ME AUSTIN, BUT YOU DON'T. YOU ALWAYS THINK EVERYTHING IS OKAY BUT IT'S NOT. I'M SORRY I'M BEING AN A-HOLE RIGHT NOW BUT FOR SOME REASON IT IS NATURAL FOR ME TO GIVE YOU THE COLD SHOULDER, TO SOMEHOW MAKE YOU CARE THAT I'M NOT IN YOUR LIFE ANYMORE. BUT GUESS WHAT, THAT'S NOT EVEN WORKING EITHER. SO YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TEXT BACK FOR ANOTHER 4 HOURS, AND I'M GOING TO IGNORE THAT YOU EVEN TEXTED ME TODAY. THAT YOU EVEN CARED. BECAUSE YOU NEVER DO, AND YOU NEVER WILL. I'M NOT IMPORTANT ENOUGH, AND I NEVER WILL BE.